Saturday, April 9, 2011

My sinuses are going to burst open; pollen is a poison slowly swelling in my cheekbones.

I need a drastic change.  Is graduating drastic enough?  I wish I were blonde again.  But this time, REALLY blonde, no highlights, just beautiful light honey colored reddish blonde.

My hair is feet long.  There is no number, because I'm implying multiples of feet.  The ends are dead, and I have a secretive just-for-me dreadlock underneath the left side of my head.  I may let it fall out; my hair is too thick and wavy to look pretty and smooth in dreads.  Hilary's hair came out so beautiful because her hair was already fine and straight and smooth.  At least, that's the way I see it because my dread looks like a rat made a nest under my ear and it swallowed the bead I put in there.  We'll see what happens.  If I weren't trying to act, I would already have wrist tattoos and a head full of dreads.

The length of my hair is just so... me.  It's a part of me.  I want to cut it to have something new, but at the same time I love when I get that perfect wave and it falls down my back in a heap Having my long hair keeps my face looking thin even when I know it's getting fat.  And don't say "you're not getting fat" because I split two jeans last month and my bras are all tight.

My job is killing my health; there are cookies and doughnuts for free and I can take home whatever.  Breakfast bars from French Meadows seem like a good idea, but I have a feeling it's all sugar and contributing to the massiveness of my thighs.

So maybe what I'll do is this:  I'll wait, and cut off my hair for graduation.  And maybe get that tattoo I wanted, just not on my wrist.  But that's a whole 'nother month away and patience is not one of my strong suits.

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